COTTON CANDY KISSES...LIKE HEAVEN

It's back to one day at a time since there isn't much I can do about the hemivertebra issue until we get moved to Charlotte and find an orthopedist.  I do plan to ask my pediatrician about it at Priya's appointment at the end of the month.  It's in the back of my mind for now, but why waste my time worrying about something I can't do anything about for at least another month when I can be enjoying a whole month of spending time with my angel?

Being married to a psychiatrist means I get free life tips and tricks, and one of the things my husband has taught me is "being in the moment."  Practicing "being in the moment" actually rewires your brain. It is a REALLY good exercise to do when you are feeling anxious about something.  It slows all the internal stuff down.  To practice, you basically just really relish a moment in time, whether it be driving down the road or eating a mint or feeling the breeze or sun on your skin.  You describe the moment to yourself using all of your senses and then note how it makes you feel too.  I often forget to "be in the moment," but sometimes I remember to do it.  This afternoon I did it while feeding Priya her bottle and kissing the top of her head (one of my absolute favorite things to do in the whole world).  I won't go into all the descriptions of the moment, but I asked myself how I could describe how kissing her head feels, and the thought popped into my mind that kissing her head and lightly rubbing my lips across the wisps of her hair is like taking a small piece of cotton candy and brushing it ever so lightly across my lips.  It is literally the sweetest moment I can think of.  Then I thought how it made me feel, and all I can say is "like Heaven."  It seems to me that my heart cannot possibly be any fuller than in the moments when I am sitting quietly with Priya kissing her sweet little head.  I wonder if that feeling of heart-fullness, connectedness, peace, and bliss is what all the world wonders after in their religions.  It's like a love that cannot be felt any deeper, wider, or higher, wrapped into a moment of time connected with another...a God-moment for sure.  If only we could remember how GOOD it feels to be in this state all the time, I think it would be easier to empty one's self of selfishness and really try to connect with others around us.  Then we'd all be living in Heaven.

(It's also quite amazing to kiss her little toes too...LOVE!)